Dating when you have children can feel overwhelming and pretty scary because you aren’t the only one you have to think about when you start seeing someone new. There are a lot of things that you’ll have to take into consideration, like will your kids get along with this new person, will they pick up any undesirable habits, or what happens if your kids get too attached to the person and the relationship doesn’t work out… All of these things can make someone not want to start dating again until the kids are older and understand the ins and outs of a relationship.
If you find that you long for companionship and conversation where the topics do not include Dora the Explorer or Spongebob, then maybe you are ready to dip your toes in the dating pool. If you aren’t ready do dive right in, joining a dating site like LoveBeginsAt.com is the perfect opportunity to talk to other single parents without having to worry if you have some remnant of your kid’s art project stuck to your face. Because you’ll be talking to one another through the computer, it makes things so much easier and relaxed.
Just like any other dating website (or meeting someone the conventional way), there are some dos and don’ts that you should adhere to.
Do: Be Honest
Honesty is the best police in everything you do—especially dating. While you are creating your online profile, you’ll want to highlight your qualities, experiences, and goals. Include information on your profile that draws people in and want to learn more about you.
Don’t: Over Exaggerate
While you are creating your profile, you may be tempted to over emphasize your ability to make delicious empanadas or run a marathon without breaking a sweat. If things work out, they will discover these things (and more) on their own.
Do: Take Things Slow
If you’re a go getter who wants things right away, you may find it hard to take any relationship (especially a new one) slow. You will have to remember that you are bringing someone new into your family and you will want to make sure they are a good fit. You can’t evaluate how this new person will fit in if you rush things.
Don’t: Introduce the Kids Right Away
Before you had kids, you wouldn’t introduce the person you’re seeing to your parents right away, right? You wanted to make sure they would be sticking around and that they were a good person. The same goes with your kids. You want to make sure this new person is a good influence and will only bring positivity to the fold. Not to mention you don’t want your children to get confused or form a skewed sense of relationships if you are bringing home someone new every month.
Do: Use Common Sense
When you begin talking to someone new, be it online or in real life, you will want to be cautious about your personal details. Only when you are confident the person is who they say they are and they won’t bring any harm to you or your children, then you can be more open with them. Never agree to meet someone until you are absolutely ready. This is especially important when it comes to bringing them around your children!
Don’t: Bring Your Children Along
Let’s say you meet someone online and you want to meet them in person, it should go without saying that it’s a good idea to leave the kids at home. Like the previous “don’t,” you don’t want to confuse them, but you also don’t want to risk their safety. Hopefully you won’t meet someone who would put you in danger, but it is always best to ebb on the side of being too cautious.
Just because you are a single parent does not mean that you have to be alone until the kids are in college. You can meet some incredible people on dating sites. All you have to do is put yourself out there, use good judgment, and have an open mind. You never know… You could find the love of your life that can bring a lot to the family unit.